Well ladies I’ve been made redundant
Yet my skills are still abundant.
Now that I am 53
It seems the scrapheap is for me!
My role no longer is required
My talents all have been retired.
And yet my skills in life are vast
They’re now and real, not in the past.
I run a house, co-ordinate
Make sure that no-one’s ever late.
I churn out food all made from scratch
And pair the socks to make them match.
I do the ironing with panache
And make packed lunches in a flash.
I send them all to work and school
With stomachs full to give them fuel.
I act as taxi everywhere
Just running teens from here to there.
I do the shopping, plan the meals
Our house is run on well-oiled wheels.
And all of this while fighting flushes
Trying to make it look like blushes.
Battling weight around my middle
And the need to always piddle.
Dried out parts that once were moist
And pelvic floor that needs a hoist.
Hair that once was full and lush
But now is just a thinning bush.
And all of this while smiling freely
Pretending that it’s alright really.
Cleared away for sweet young things
Who still wear fanny pads with wings.
So any CEOs who need
A person who can take the lead.
To organise and juggle tasks
YOU REALLY ONLY HAVE TO ASK!
Is it wrong to want a nap
And have a little sleep?
Just a quick one – 40 winks
No time to count damned sheep.
I’ve made it half way through the day
A rest is well deserved.
It helps to charge my batteries
And keep me well preserved.
Keep on reading!
My five favourite words of the day:
GYM IS CLOSED FOR REFURBISHMENT
No…that’s not me in the picture. If it was, I wouldn’t have to go to the gym in the first place!
And I certainly wouldn’t be jumping around like that – not unless I wanted to pull every muscle in my body, knacker my knees, put my back out, drop my glasses…and bloody wet myself!
Here’s the second poem I’ve written from my poetry challenge. The topic suggested was ‘prickly facial hair’ from Kooky Chic
Please tell me why in middle-age
My hairs have reached a bonkers stage?
The ones up top are falling out,
From stranger places they now sprout.
Keep on reading!
Here’s the first poem I’ve written inspired by my poetry challenge. Someone over on Facebook suggested the idea, ‘Dancing like no-one is looking, then noticing that they ALL are!’
I went out drinking with a friend,
We both knew how the night would end.
Laughter, fun and raucous dancing,
Stopping life from fast advancing.
Dressed in heels and make-up on,
Our fear and inhibitions gone.
We ate a meal – how civilised,
Excitement only just disguised.
A cocktail first and then one more,
We headed off towards the door.
Towards the club where deep within,
Our fantasy would soon begin.
Keep on reading!
Sometimes I like to live life on the edge…usually the edge of a family-sized bar of chocolate, a Mojito, a party-sized bag of Walkers Sensations Thai sweet chilli crisps, or a large G&T!
As you’re following my blog you’ll have sussed that I like writing poems. So far I’ve covered: the maxi dress, shampoo, the teenager’s homework, the menopause and incontinence! I’m now trying to think of my next topic, and I suddenly had the idea of asking YOU! Here comes the edge bit…
If you have a suggestion for a poem topic, write it in the comments and I’ll see what I can do.
Over on Facebook they’ve joined in with gusto! Here’s a quick little ditty inspired by the suggestion of ‘menopausal hair’…
There once was a middle-aged lady
Whose hair became wiry and fady.
Out of control
To brush, comb or roll,
She stalked around hatted and shady!
Don’t leave me hanging! If no-one joins in, the only things I’ll be on the edge of are mortification, embarrassment, humiliation and…discombobulation!!
Over to you… 🙂
Here is part 1 of my MEMES about midlife. I love making MEMES; random thoughts constantly pop into my head when I least expect it. I can often be found walking/driving around talking – or indeed laughing – to myself.
I think my sense of humour is great – obviously because it’s mine – I just hope you lovely followers think it’s great too lol! (Yes I know using ‘lol’ shows my age. I’ve been told by my teens many times that I’m sad, but hey, I don’t care. I like it. Especially now I know it doesn’t really mean ‘lots of love’. I spent a long time thinking that texts from the builder were rather inappropriate – until I had this explained to me. Turned out that “Your pipework needs attention too lol!” wasn’t actually a sexual innuendo offering me an illicit seeing to in the back of his van!) Keep on reading!
I’d like to take my body back,
Relinquish your control.
To pick the times I want to pee,
Well, that’s my desperate goal.
You seem to choose the worst of times
To make your presence known.
Dancing, sneezing, laughing and
Wet pants will send me home.
Keep on reading!
Those of you that have been following my blog for a while, will remember my post about the day the camera crew came to the gym. I described in eye-watering detail my gym outfit: a pair of grey, long cotton supermarket shorts; a scruffy, old green t-shirt; black socks and cheap trainers. Nice!
So, decided I should at least look the part at the gym. It’s no good being able to talk the talk, I have to be able to walk the walk as well – and preferably walk that walk in rather nice matching lycra. So here is my new outfit: Keep on reading!