I have two eyes…

display-1313664_1920Went to optician’s to choose frames for new glasses. There’s a huge flaw in the selection system currently in place. The frames on display are just that – display only.

I carefully picked out a few to try on, obviously removing my current glasses to do so – and what did that mean? Exactly. I couldn’t see. I could see my face, and make out that I was wearing glasses, but that’s as far as it went.

The assistant brought me a magnifying mirror – 3″× 3″. Great. I could now see one eye.

Not very helpful for working out whether or not the frames suited me. I intend to wear them on both eyes…

Not Quite Blind as a Bat

eye-chart-24489_1280Went for eye test; reading with my reading glasses is becoming more and more difficult. Clearly need some stronger ones.

Optician’s assistant went through all pre-test tests: counting white dots on edge of screen, having air fired into my eyes, and (strangely) looking at a brown door on a red, turquoise and green house in the distance. Not sure what that was supposed to test other than my dislike of the jarring colour scheme of the house. I thanked god it was in the distance.

Went in to optician’s room and was told peripheral vision was good, distance vision was fine, veins were fine, no glaucoma and my taste in house décor was spot on. Yes, yes, yes never mind all that. As I’m now on to my third prescription for reading glasses, when will it stop deteriorating and am I actually going blind?

Optician managed to keep a straight face as he explained that by the mid-50s eyesight evens out and comes to a plateau, so yours will do that soon. Soon? Soon? I’m only just bloody 50! Nowhere near mid-50s the cheeky sod…